Part one of twelve in my part of CCY’s Twelve Moments in Anime 2008 project. These posts are not really in any particular order. The last two moments probably have the most intentional placement. This post also contains spoilers.

ef – a tale of memories is still the only SHAFT show I’ve seen (with the exception of the currently airing ef – a tale of melodies). Supposedly SHAFT normally has an artsy and pretentious style, perhaps similar to how Sunrise has convoluted and overcomplicated plots. Even so, despite being a visual novel adaptation, ef – a tale of memories was probably the most unique show I had seen by February 2008. Although shows such as Cowboy Bebop and Death Note were very much serious in tone, and harem adaptations like Kanon and Air already pulled my heart multiple times, I didn’t realize how much presentation and art style could have such effect and impact on the story and the viewer’s perception of a scene.

Episode seven of ef – a tale of memories is easily one of  the most emotional and heartwrenching episodes I’ve seen in anime. The Chihiro/Renji part of the episode is sad enough with Renji’s desperation at the end of it, hoping Chihiro will not write the day’s events in her diary. Halfway through the episode, we begin to learn about Miyako’s past. Her parents begin to argue and hate each other. Their abhorrence for each other eventually leads to the neglect of their daughter, causing Miyako to believe she has been forgotten. She says her world became silent with the absence of her parents’ love and affection.

In Hirono, she finds a potential lover but more importantly someone that may care about her. Eagerly desiring someone’s attention and love, Miyako latches onto him. She doesn’t have anyone else in the world and needs Hirono.

They agree to a rendezvous at noon, one Miyako is looking forward to. The scene continues with phone calls to Hirono, questioning why Hirono is late. Initially she is cheerful and playful, but the mood quickly sours as she becomes slightly angry at his tardiness. Suddenly we get a flashback of what Kei said before: “I will wipe you out from Onii-chan’s heart. He will then say farewell to you. And then, it will be over. I will end this.” Suddenly, Miyako becomes intensely afraid of being forgotten by Hirono, similar to how her parents forgot her.

Her tone changes again, trying to be gentle as she offers to pick him up if he mistook the meeting place. The music gently steps in, not quite tense but still feeling very omnious. Her every word is displayed on the screen. Miyako asks if he got into an accident, but with no reply again, she angrily leaves another voicemail asking why he isn’t even calling her back. As the music slowly intensifies and the screen gets ever more crowded with her sentences, she becomes increasingly desperate to the point of begging him to come and apologizing for any mistakes she may have made. She says she will still wait for him, but he never does come. The last thing we hear from Miyako is a desperate cry: “I don’t want to disappear from your heart!”

Tears formed in my eyes halfway through this scene. Miyako is simply trying to keep close to Hirono because of a legitimate fear; no one wants to be forgotten and left behind. Her despair and hopelessness pained my heart, and I was amazed by the emotions caused by a single scene. I was shocked, depressed, capitvated, amazed, and overwhelmed… I don’t think I can ever put what I felt into words.

Although my parents are still here with me and they actually care, and I still have friends that very much care for me, I could almost relate to Miyako. I have an incredible fear of being forgotten by my friends, so in a way, I could just almost feel her pain. There are times I believe I’m a fifth wheel and I’m only there to serve as a substitute when someone else cannot hang out. I don’t think I would become as desperate and broken as Miyako, but perhaps my own fear simply amplified the effect of this particular scene.

Overall, this episode was quality. Although the first part cannot compare to the second half, SHAFT did an outstanding job on presentation and reaffirmed my belief in anime as a legit form of entertainment and art. Even the ED sequence, which features Miyako desperately trying to open a door, helped to add onto the feeling I had as the episode finished. I raged when Kei deletes Miyako’s messages. It only helped me empathize with Miyako because she isn’t the one with the dirty moves.

Best anime moment of 2008? Close, but there are two in particular that were even better. Still, I will never forget this cellphone scene because of its sheer impact.

This post is tagged ef, shaft, twelve moments in anime